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Girls don’t like boys, girls like fanfiction, food and middle aged celebrities.

(via ginnabean)
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I could imagine living in a tiny place like this with my future husband for the beginning of our marriage. We would live on very little and learn to appreciate each other more than anything on earth. We would survive together.
(via stumblingintolove)
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(via buioinverno)
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The Defibrillator Toaster
My mom would be so annoyed… every morning I would run into the kitchen screaming “WE’RE LOSING THEM!!! BEEP BEEP BEEPBEEPBEEP!”
“DON’T YOU DIE ON ME, DAMNIT!!! NURSE, WE NEED 12 CC’S OF CREAM CHEESE, STAT!!!”
He’s bread, Jim.
Time of deliciousness: 7:15 A.M
If we don’t restart his heart , he’s toast!
JESUS CRUST.
JAM IT!
“Daddy’s in a butter place now, kids.”
I WASN’T EVEN GOING TO REBLOG UNTIL I SAW THE SHIT TON OF PUNS
HES BREAD JIM
JESUS CRUST
(via je5usfuckingchrist)
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Had a lovely time in #Potsdam .it is a beautiful city #Germany (at Potsdam, Germany)
It is my neighboring town. And it’s really nice there. Berlin and Potsdam are two cities, but you hardly notice it ´cause they are so close to each other.
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today in drama class i had to act like i was high and i literally just quoted popular text posts and i got congratulated on my performance
(via divergent-ravenclaw)
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what if your webcam was on right now and was broadcasting in Times Square
Wut
(via je5usfuckingchrist)



